Saturday, 23 May 2009

entry into the arena of manipulation...

This month has been a stressful one for numerous reasons. Despite a pact to not go out or drink untill the end of exams, we didn't stick to it for long....5 days to be precise.

The evening of our last blog inspired wine-drinking and msn manipulations (this is where it all began) After the first bottle of wine we decided this was insufficient and after much deliberation (5 minutes) we embarked on a quick run, in the pouring rain, to the local tesco express. Our run there was simply classic! It consisted of puddle and people dodging, whilst trying to avoid falling to our demise. Once we reached Tesco, bearing in mind at this point we were already drunk and laughing hysterically, we very carefully picked up fragile items....could've ended badly.

Once returned, we cracked open the bottle of Australian Chardonnay (only the best for these bloggers). Whilst casually on MSN, we got into hilarious conversations with numerous people (manuplations part 2) and M decided to invite our beloved friend Matthew. He was round faster than we could say WINE, which was quite amazing due to the fact that M had directed incorrectly- but hey men are supposedly good with directions! Hilarity insued on the arrival of Matthew with video evidence. We shall provide you with a list of quotes that will no doubt be meaningless to you, but incredibly embaressing and funny to us:
  • B turned it (light) off to make it more kinky
  • M mocking B: Let me share a chair with you
  • M mocking B (again): Let me share a bed with Mat
  • Mat you hair is so bouncy and soft (whilst worringly strocking Mat's hair :/)
Later on into the evening, as things started to die down, M was innocently napping on the bed and then felt a forceful shove off the bed, the source being our guest, Mat. This ended with M being sprawled on the floor in utter shock of Mat's uncalled for actions...we wont be inviting him back again any soon. Good times!

B and I, having being told off by numerous people for our lack of meals, decided to go to Pizza Hut for pizza and the infamous cooky dough. At first sight this may not seem as such of a traunmatic experience, but oh wrong you would be. A pizza and desert that would take normal people to eat in an hour, took us at least three. We were there so long that the waitress came over to us and asked and i quote "have you finished nibbling". Our response was one of embaressment, as we had clearly not finished, we were just taking our time. We were greeted whilst eating by a lost child, who had mistakenly taken a wrong turn and ended at our table. He looked startled and bemused, giving M dodgy looks whilst thinking "you're not my dad". After looks diusgist were exchanged, he turned on his heels and found his way back to his family.

Before we were even seated we encountered stressful obstacles, one being the door without instructions (which clearly all standard public doors require), and the other being the difficult question of where we'd like to sit. Knowing B doesn't have an opinion on such things, M brazenly chose a good for spot for our dining experience.

On the walk home we got a call from a future rooms, L & E, inviting us to full moon at Sankey's. After hurredly getting ready in record time (a record that is constantly being resat) we proceeded to have a good night :)

Our next night out was to Bijou which was an incredibly drunken experiance. We actually spent time getting ready, and pre-pre-drinking almost of 3 bottles of wine meaning we were already gone by the time we reached Hulme for pre-drinking! While walking to Hulme M identified a new crossing which hadnt been noticed before: a debate ensued. We shan't go into it, it was messy, but the term 'dropped curve' featured widely. Typically, we spent much time telling each other how drunk the other was and how embaressing it is to be seen with them. On arriving at Hulme bar, not realising we could be seen, B downed her remaining wine and threw it in the bin....classy. On arriving at Bijou, not realising the weight-pressure ratio of opening a taxi door, M fell out of the taxi....classy. After a few more drinks inside the club, we were well and truly hammered and came back to K3 (B's residence) and had toast and an emotionally deep talk that neither of us quite remember - incredibly annoying when we finally established how M feels about current relationships. A very good night, in all.

Seeing as we had an upcoming exam, we felt it wise to get together and revise. Said revision ended up with manipulations part 3, introducing a new victim into the arena. Later, we attempted to watch Twiliht. Our initial excitment at being able to successfully watch a film quickly faded after numerous attempts to find a workable link. Quotes of the evening include:
  • look at the pixels on that, theyre awful!
  • you were closing tabs like a MANIAC!
  • havn't spoken to you in ages, where have you been?
The night was traumatic for us both, and we shall now never speak of it again as it hurts too much.

Another night we were invited to go to the IMAX to see Star Trek. M was plagued with sadness at the prospect at having to spend £3 on a small drink, so decided to go without even though she was mighty parched. As fate would have it, Bilz happened to have a free drink coupon. I have never seen M so happy, her little face literally lit up! After being inappropriatly offered 'all of our desires' and 'a screen that is taller than an 8 story building' we watched the film and we were mildy impressed. We walked back, got splashed by puddles as the guys tried to outleap each other, and were in awe of R's ninja jumping. Amazing! We came back to K3 and played crash team racing which was good good fun :)
Our other cinema trip was to see Fighting, which began our love affair with Channing Tatum, who is undeniably perfect in every way, clearly is lovely to his sister and never has a cross word to say about anyone. We <3 you Channing, if your reading. There is no doubt in our minds that you are.

After a hard days revision we both felt the need to leave Viccy Halls and M hit on the genius idea of going to The Garratt, famous for our previous Irish-inspired drinking times. We filled up £2 double vodka and cokes...and ended up drunkenly speaking loudly about boys (of course), mistakently staring at nearby talent for a long time. We'd decided to start writing some quotes down as we always forget classic moments - I (B) woke up in the morning with a draft text saying "i can still feel my forehead ITS OKAY"...
Once we weere liquered up we crossed the road and went to 5th Avenue for what we now call 'sleazy saturdays', a night famous for vodka redbull and...sleazy guys. M got lucky with an Italian guy, but only after we had a groove on the dancefloor to some realllly good music :). Good night.

Instead of doing any work, we decided to walk off our hangover and walk down to Fallowfield to get tickets for the Big One thats gunna be on the last day of our exams. M was very happy (for reasons that shall not be mentioned). As we walked down we admired Plattfields Park and so
were not disheartened when the tickets weren't on sale as we walked through the park. We were shocked and amazed to find that it was acutally reallly pretty: an oasis in the middle of Manchester, one could say. We were high on happiness and the beautiful landscape - relative to Manchester of course, and made plans to appreciate more nature over the summer. We decided that energy was serverly needed and it wad for this reason alone that we decided to eat a big lunch at Varisity. We were proud of ourselves.

Over the course of the revision period we have noticed that we each get more hilarious when revising. We like to think that we pay more attention to the art of comedy whilst avoiding doing work, such as "a and b obvkisuly lack confidence in their ability to be correct"..(shall fill in later)

We have also noticed that, when drunk (and sometimes when sober) we declare our undying love for one another. The first such incident is when we parted ways on (embaressingly) our first night out! B was, obviously, the first to say 'I love you', but she doesn't remember this. Other frequently heard comments are "i'm so glad i met u", "we're so much better than everyone else' etc etc. We could go on. Other kinds of love of the heterosexual kind have been rampant (much like inflation, who needs to keep its business to itself). M has gotten significantly less happy as initial excitement at potential love has fizzled considerably as men show their ability to be women. B has reciprocated these sentiments after an equal experiance.

Following an night out at Pout in Revolution a few of M's Birmingham friends made a quick pitstop in Manchester. We picked up a hitchiker called Tom for the taxi journey home who must think we're both crazy (note: despite was M says, B is not in love with Tom, and is not the one that got with the Italian). After sharing a few jokes at B's expense .(B is not a peasant, and dislikes being called such), and dodging a few flies M got whisked away to Liverpool for the night/morning to visit another friend. How random.

22nd may was B's birthday and also the day of our first exam :(....we won't mention it as we don't talk about exams. We brought various juices and alcohols, after nearly causing a human traffic jam in WorldWide by leaving through the wrong door, and played Rockband for hours whilst getting steadily more drunk. The night progressed and it was decided that more alocohol was needed so we took a quick trip to Spar and proceeded to make Cheeky V, with added vodka (mistake). After loudly playing 'ride the bus' and 'snap' we were all quite drunk, especially B who had been ruthlessly picked on during drinking games and encouraged to down a potion of pure evil. Woke up the next day with a horrific hangover and few memories of yelling at M, and F (aka "go to sleep" etc)

And here we are, after 2 sessions worth of blogging, and we really cannot be bothered to put pictures up at the moment but they be sure that they will be done soon enough.

Love, B & M

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